Friday, April 13, 2012

Fun filled Windows update day

Today was a fun filled Windows update day. I haven't had one filled with this many problems for months.

So why was today's especially frustrating? Friday the 13th? No.

It was because I was supposed to be working on the rough draft of my History Senior Seminar paper today.

So naturally, given the fact that I am focused to use this dino-computer (my laptop melted a couple of months ago), it would have to be a extra special update day when I needed to be able to use the computer the most.


Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Another damn semester

Well, it looks like I am going to be stuck at college for one more damn semester. Between serious doubts that my English requirements have been met (departmental difficulties) and the fact that a single class has sucked in all my time...well, as I said, it looks like I am not going to be graduating this semester.

For those of you who are curious, the class that has been sucking in all the time is a history class. It is thy capstone class---Senior Seminar in History. This is the first week this semester that I have not been at the library digging though a box of government memos...since week two of the semester. Every spare day that I had I have been at the library...I spent 30 hours there during spring break. It would have been 35 if they wouldn't had a furlough day. I have a folder two inches tight with single-spaced typewritten notes, and last week I finally hit the point where I think I have enourgh to support a twenty-five to thirty-five page paper.

Plus, for the past two weeks, I don't remember a day without a headache...actually, it has been longer than two weeks, but I am having a hard time figuring out when the headaches begin (I go to bed with a headache, I wake up with a headache, it is a constant thing). I have lost ten pounds this semester, and we all know that I did not actually have any weight to spare to begin with. My wife does not remember the last time I looked, or sounded healthy. And no, I do not have health insurance or enourgh money to go see a doctor. I am hoping that it is stress.

There are a few other things going on that I can't talk about.

I have thrown every class I am taking other than this senior seminar under the bus. I am currently trying to figure out if it is too late to drop Honors Thesis (Literature), or if I am just going to have to take an F in it (Senior Seminar sucked up all the time and energy I had.) Along with my business---under the bus, it went. And this semester saw the loveliness of the PayPal Forbidden Four drama and a rather nasty campaign against a fellow writer in the Golden Dawn community.

(And we all know that writers cannot afford to toss their businesses under the bus. The only nice thing I have to say is it is a good thing I am self-employed or I would have fucked one of the easy classes I am taking. Yes, I am having trouble surviving the two easy classes---it is going to be touch and go as it is.)

Basically, it has been solid stress this semester. You know that it is bad when you think about stepping in front of the lightrail train.

Well, I would love to sit here and complain some more, but I have sixty pages of rough draft to read from classmates for today's peer review session; and yes, that is also the same damn class.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Let me use some vile language

As many of my regular readers know, I occasionally comment on the doings of the modern Golden Dawn on one of my other blogs. And someone just informed me that in one of my recent posts that I used the vilest language to describe one of the players and their esoteric Order.

The first thing to go through my mind? This person has never worked on a construction site.

If he thinks that my language is vile now, he should have heard me a couple of decades ago. I guess ghost-writing Russian Bride adcopy, dabbling in the erotica market, and the language my father used to use makes me insensentive to what other people consider vile. Several years of restaurant management has cleaned up my language...but I am capable of much worse.

Of course, I must admit that I think some pretty vile language when I think about this particular person and their friends. I cannot help it. My fellow writers will understand---this is a person who asked his friends to give a writer a bunch of negative one-star reviews on Amazon because the writer's opinions did not match his own.

But we are not supposed to use the words "fool" and "cult" to describe this person, their friends, or their behavior because they are the vilest words in the English langauge. Especially because people like me have been busy trying to destroy his Order for twenty years.

(I honestly didn't think he needed to be destroyed before last, I am deeply offended as both a book reviewer and a writer, so I might have to change my mind.)

Let's just say, I have a whole bagful of vile langauge that I have not started to use yet.

On the bright note, I plan on using this to officially renounce my Golden Dawn membership...if the local lodge will accept my notice (they have told me to stick my resignation in my ear on a couple of occasions).